After 33 years of sobriety David fell apart. He didn’t drink. But all the underpinnings of his mental, emotion and spiritual life were swept away in the horrible realization that he was not the man he thought he was. And the actions that he rationalized to him self as part of his program were bad not good. Bad because of the consequences that fell upon other people as well as upon himself.
It took a long time to realize that he had been the victim of his own “self” and that his “self” fed into other powers that allowed him to stray. He was not a victim but an ignorant participant. Ignorant because his own rationalization and pride had shut off the sunlight of the spirit and once more in his life the false appeared to be the truth. The shock and disbelief were literally physically overwhelming, bringing him to his knees and completely incapacitating his ability to think or act. The only thing he could do was pray and that was more a wail than any coherent lifting of his mind or heart to God. He was broken and defeated..
It would be nice to say that with his realization and defeat that God zapped him into sanity and effectiveness. This was not the case. It took over a year and a half to begin to be settled again. And in that year and a half David had to completely change his relationship with God and other people. He had humiliated himself now he had to truly find out what humility really is. He had to go where the answers were because there was no answers any other place. David found his way when ruin and death seemed the only future. But he was able to trade this bleak prospect for one of miracles and magic.
In that year and a half , David found that he was not the only person with advanced years of practicing a spiritual program who faced this sort of crisis. Many people with 10, 15, 25 and more years in recovery or a spiritual life had been brought to their knees by an unexpected or unseen crisis. Many of the others did not survive because they did not know how and could not or would not seek.
How? How had David survived when so many others in like situations made the supreme sacrifice? That is the purpose of “The Great Reality”. To tell and teach you precisely how to face, deal with and grow through life shattering prospects and experiences.
More anon.
